Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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