What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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