just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize