It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Randomize
