Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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