I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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