you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
