Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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