I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
