No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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