Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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