Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
