Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
