how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
