did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Randomize
