my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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