You can't motorboat a personality
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
i out mim tonsoeep
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