Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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