Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
