he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
