Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
third nipple confirmed
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
