Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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