he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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