When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
