the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
