The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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