Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Less talking, more tequila
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
