i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
