just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
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