don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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