I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm at about main and main street
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
