wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
