You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize