what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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