They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
