I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
