I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Boobs speak an international language.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
