She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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