She is in my trunk
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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