apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
