Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
