So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
