AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
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