hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
