Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
