He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
