I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
