sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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