Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I AM VODKA MAN
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
