After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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